Writer's Surge

[Evil_Genious]

Redness in my eyes, tired of fucken shit
wisdom from the lies,
that's why I never call it quits
everyday I try, my honour never takes a hit
you fucken bitches die, no I'll never give a shit
middle finger high, you'll be bent over loving it
sometimes I wonder why, I was born with this yellow skin
every form I fill, I have to say my origin
my only error in being born Pakistani
even though they nonvocal, I know they can't stand me
coz fuckers blowing up shit and claiming it religious
what they destroying up is all our joining bridges
and for them whats worser then then dying a dirty death?
they can't envisage life living known a racist
it ain't me they speaking for, coz I'm just tryna live
but someones gotta pay, so I guess that's why I gotta give




It's shyte, and criticisms welcome.....

[Cheeky_Princess]

I really like it

esp the bit about being born pakistani.. and the job form bit etc

That shits gnna hit me as i wanna enter the media field.. its even worse for me...

[Guji-Ji]

Originally Posted by Cheeky_Princess I really like it esp the bit about being born pakistani.. and the job form bit etc That shits gnna hit me as i wanna enter the media field.. its even worse for me...

Well from the looks of things the BBC employs more Pakistanis then whites lol. Every freakin' reporter they have is asian lol.

As for the writing, awesome man! I liked that a lot. You've said so much in so very few words.

[Evil_Genious]

Thanks peeps, I don't normally write sht..... I juss bursted it own coz there was no Nessboot to chat to on MSN... LOL...

[MojoJojo]

Pretty good EG, heres my attempt lol.

I try to educate, but all i get back is red tape
People don't want to relate and all they do is spectate
whilst i sit and try to meditate on a westbound carriage
to a destination where people migrate to and from twenty fo' seven.
Public enemy till the day of judgement,
Dad taught me never to trust thrice
or the fuckers gonna make you eat rice
until the mice run rabid over you whilst you shout until you cannot spite.
Trying to figure my way into the light,
the crows hover over me every night
but i shall never raise my hand,
As i know they want me never to reach the promise land.

[Zero]

Man, I couldn't even right one stanza of poetry.

So I can't criticise anything...but I can only say that EG's and Mojo's rhymes are bril..

[Rab C Nesbit]

Bent over?
Loving it?

God, how did you know?

[Spider Pig]

lovin the efforts, keep em goin, turn this into real talk rhyme thread

[Sunshine]

Originally Posted by Zero Man, I couldn't even right one stanza of poetry. So I can't criticise anything...but I can only say that EG's and Mojo's rhymes are bril..

What Zee-Row said.

EG and Mojo... written anything else? Would love to read it.