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i'm not having sex tonight...
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Thread: i'm not having sex tonight...

  1. #1
    Member ---Miss_Khan---'s Avatar
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    Default i'm not having sex tonight...

    I'm not having sex tonight...

    I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.



    FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

    I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

    So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

    Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

    The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store.

    I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.


    Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

    I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

    Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"

    I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

    And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

    Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....!!!!!

    whats dis place widout me?
    thts like jewls widout ice,
    china widout rice,
    india widout spice,
    the bible widout christ,
    shit jus aint right.!


  2. #2
    Respected Member shelim's Avatar
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    its tru tho....
    i read dis b4, make sense in some relatonships...
    Last edited by shelim; 10-12-2005 at 17:19.

    OMG De Ja Vu, No! it's INCEPTION!!!

    Simple rule.. TS asks you.. You don't ask TS..

  3. #3
    Respected Member ruby angel's Avatar
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    Default

    lolz! hahaha..thts so funny.....

  4. #4
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    lol, tht was a gud un!
    I NEED A SIG.................

    http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=OsdD43Q3mOc




  5. #5

    Default

    yes it is

  6. #6
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ---Miss_Khan---
    I'm not having sex tonight...







    Ok go on then tommorrow it is, why do i get the feeling im being used here
    Last edited by lineyman; 13-12-2005 at 20:26.
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  7. #7
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    lol @ liney ur more funny then the joke
    Hard work never killed anyone but why take the risk?





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    Suman says:luks nice

  8. #8
    Respected Member Voodookid's Avatar
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    im not havin sex tonight either..
    i feel lyk chicken tonight...

    e: vdk[at]theasianplace[dot]net
    MAAAA, THE MEATLOAF..... FUCK!

    "I'm not heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual. I'm just sexual. NO. MOTHERF*CKING. PREFIX.\"

  9. #9
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    lol @ voodoo, guess kays isnt up4 it tonite eh!
    Last edited by MizzyBone; 14-12-2005 at 01:54.
    Hard work never killed anyone but why take the risk?





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  10. #10
    Respected Member Voodookid's Avatar
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    with ur dog? that is not classed as sexual intercourse dude.. lol
    e: vdk[at]theasianplace[dot]net
    MAAAA, THE MEATLOAF..... FUCK!

    "I'm not heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual. I'm just sexual. NO. MOTHERF*CKING. PREFIX.\"

  11. #11
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    lol voodoo i told u b4 even tho ur a mans best friend ur not a dog!
    Hard work never killed anyone but why take the risk?





    Suman says:yeh its e
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  12. #12
    Respected Member Voodookid's Avatar
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    nah ur mistaking me for zainull dude..
    e: vdk[at]theasianplace[dot]net
    MAAAA, THE MEATLOAF..... FUCK!

    "I'm not heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual. I'm just sexual. NO. MOTHERF*CKING. PREFIX.\"

  13. #13
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    hey hey voodoo u aint that ugly m8! lol
    Hard work never killed anyone but why take the risk?





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    Suman says:lol
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    Suman says:luks nice

  14. #14
    Respected Member Voodookid's Avatar
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    well, i dont like to boast.. but hell no lol
    e: vdk[at]theasianplace[dot]net
    MAAAA, THE MEATLOAF..... FUCK!

    "I'm not heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual. I'm just sexual. NO. MOTHERF*CKING. PREFIX.\"

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