Doesn't feel real...

[Hiroshi]

Sorry, my last post was actually a reply to yourself

When did I say you shouldn't try to work things out with each other? As I've said, everybody has flaws. You can't change someone's nature but you can certainly try to change a few bad habits for the ones you care about and love. Just because it's "hard to find a partner these days" doesn't mean you should settle for anybody you come across.

My point was that if she's already doubting her feelings towards the person then what's the point? If she isn't proud to be with the person she is with, what is the whole point of the relationship? When you like/love someone, you know it. Feelings can't be forced.

[DJ B4VVY]

You're right, feelings can't be forced but they can grow and if you give someone a chance, it could turn out that they're the one you've been waiting for your whole life!

[Evil_Genious]

When did I say you shouldn't try to work things out with each other? As I've said, everybody has flaws. You can't change someone's nature but you can certainly try to change a few bad habits for the ones you care about and love. Just because it's "hard to find a partner these days" doesn't mean you should settle for anybody you come across.

My point was that if she's already doubting her feelings towards the person then what's the point? If she isn't proud to be with the person she is with, what is the whole point of the relationship? When you like/love someone, you know it. Feelings can't be forced.

The success of most marriages isn't love. It's compromise. I don't mean compromise in settling for a perceived lesser deal, I mean compromise in accepting people with their flaws. Even our mothers, fathers, brothers & sisters have flaws, yet we can love them through them. Because that love is bonding. For love to become bonding, there needs to be a lot of time spent in laughing, crying, understanding and feeling. Living.

Sure, two people can change for each other. But it would depend on the individual on the motive. Whether that is fear, force or love - perhaps all three and more? Who knows. I can't claim to know the reason.

But I know that if you truly stepped back and looked at what the person you've ejoined in a relationship has sacrificed, expended and invested in the relationship, perhaps you might be able to see something worth honouring. All this 'looking for mr/miss right' shit, is fairytale stuff. Most people arn't blessed with a mutual love thats real. Some people fall in love, some people walk into love and others lose love.

It all depends. I think love is a word that's thrown around loosely and without due warrant. Unless you would give your eyesight for that person, you don't love them. You use them to make your life richer and more fulfilling. But not love. Love is that unspoken conviction that should the time ever arise. You would.

Anyway, I don't want to sidetrack. I just think if anyone takes advice from anyone else to decide whether or not to love or not love - then that person needs to check theyselves before they wreck theyselfs.

[Enchantress]

Yup, what eggy said.

Walt Disney lies. Happily ever after is more... give and take and settle in the middle.

However, I don't think you need to say you'd give an arm or a leg to prove you love anyone.. there's plenty of misguided people out there who think they know what love is and actually kill themselves/others because they think what they feel needs to be proven to others.

Sidetracking too, what was the question?

Hmm, give it time, not a name. A relationship is not defined by what you call it, but what you give to it. It needs nurturing and a little bit of effort. Of course that depends on what you want to get out of it. The above is for a potentially long term relationship/marriage.... if you are a person who would rather... hmm.. have "fun" then... I can't help you. '_'

[incredible]

i have a woman, I dont love her anymore.

shit happens

[Pretzel]

Good answer is "you don't know what you have until its gone" Very true, and i geddit now.